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Psychologists say that a biting child is normal. The kid learns the world in this way, trying it on the tooth. Leaving bruises and wounds on my mother’s body, the baby shows her love or bad mood. Attacking peers, he tries to gain leadership or defend himself against hooligans. Of course, you can’t tolerate the child’s aggressive behavior, but you need to get rid of the bad habit carefully so as not to injure the children's psyche.
Bad example
At 1.5–2 years old, children copy the behavior of their parents. Dad pinched or bit his mother on the shoulder, and she only laughed in response? The kid will understand that the actions of his father are a way of expressing love, and he will certainly do as an adult. Only children do not know how to calculate the power of a blow or a bite.
If a child is aggressive with peers or attacks teachers in a kindergarten, psychologists advise taking a closer look at his parents. Probably adults often:
- shout at each other;
- swear loudly;
- punish the baby for any wrongdoing.
In families with an unhealthy atmosphere, where they constantly scandal, and the father periodically raises his hand to his mother, aggressive children grow up. They do not know how to control their own emotions, even positive ones. The child bites because he does not know how to express sympathy or antipathy in another way. He takes an example from parents who know how to scream, fight and offend each other.
Adults learn to talk and not sort things out with a child. They demonstrate to the baby that feelings can be expressed in words, without resorting to physical strength. When the atmosphere in the family becomes calm and friendly, the child will forget about his bad habit and stop biting.
Parents are also recommended:
- Do not tickle the baby;
- refuse slap on the priest and other physical punishments;
- don't yell at the baby.
Some mothers, from an excess of feelings, love to gently bite the baby by the nose or buttocks. Doing so is prohibited so as not to encourage or provoke the child. Joking bites are replaced with strong hugs and kisses.
Explain and regret
Did the kid run around the room, play ball or toy with his mother, and then suddenly bite his teeth into her arm or leg? Perhaps he is tired. Children 2-3 years old only learn to talk about their feelings and physical condition. It’s difficult for a child to find words to inform the parent that he has run out of energy, so he bites.
If the baby looks exhausted and tired, the mother first explains that one should not hurt others, and then suggests drawing with crayons or paints. Creativity calms and relaxes the child, helps to relax. The child can be occupied:
- colored paper applications;
- modeling from clay or salt dough;
- kinetic sand;
- plasticine.
The kid focuses on the process and gets distracted. With the help of drawings or figures, the young creator splashes out the accumulated emotions. But it is important not only to turn the attention of the child, but also to convey to him that biting is bad.
Mom takes a few deep exhale-breaths to calm down, because the first reaction is to scream and spank. Then he squats and hugs the baby. He looks into the eyes and in a calm voice says that the baby has very sharp teeth, and when it bites, there are bruises. Mom is so hurt that she will cry now.
After these words, it is advisable to put your palm on a bitten place and make a sad face. The child will definitely want to feel sorry for his beloved mom. She suggests anointing the reddened skin with a transparent antiseptic, and sticking an adhesive plaster on top.Then the baby kisses her mother on the cheek and hugs, they put up and go together to draw.
It is necessary that the child understands that biting someone, it hurts a person. Gentle and emotional children quickly learn a lesson and stop showing aggression.
Serious talk
Did the baby start biting when he went to kindergarten? He only offends his peers, but does he communicate normally with teachers and mom? Children's groups are a mini-version of a society where there are outcasts and leaders. But if adults are trying to attract attention by actions and appearance, then the kids are guided by primitive instincts. Biting peers, the child tries to demonstrate his strength and gain respect. Take leadership positions, make new friends.
Sensitive kids just need to explain that he offends other kids. The bitten child needs to be regretted, go up to him along with the offender, so that he apologizes to his victim. You can make amends with a candy or an apple. Treats help children make contact and make friends.
If normal conversations do not work, adults change tactics. They explain to the little bully that the kids he bit will not want to be friends or play with the offender. They hope and stop talking to him.
Children aged 2–4 are told a cautionary tale about a rabbit or kitten that offended and bit its friends. The kid was having fun, but the rest licked his wounds and cried. Once the animals decided that they did not want to communicate with such a harmful and aggressive bully. They went to another kindergarten, leaving the kitten alone. At first he was delighted, because he could pick up all the toys for himself, and then he was sad. It was boring without friends. The kitten realized his mistake, apologized to friends and promised not to bite again. The animals forgave the bully and again began to play with him.
The character of the fairy tale should be like a child in character and appearance. Mom invites the baby to tell why the animal bit the rest. And at the end of a child’s tales, they are led to the conclusion that offending others is bad. If you bite peers, then no one will be friends with the bully.
When the child voices her conclusion, mom suggests coming up with the right and fun ways to become a leader. For example, help the teacher and collect toys with her. Share cars and sweets with peers.
Did the child continue to offend the rest of the children after the tale? We can say that evil microbes live on the skin of other people. When a baby bites someone, bacteria get into his tummy. They multiply there, and the child can get sick.
Aggressive children who have a difficult and difficult character should work with a psychologist. The specialist will correct the behavior of the baby. Will tell parents how to bring up a little bully. It will help the child to adapt and teach to restrain aggression.
Self defense
If a quiet and obedient kid turned into a bully, parents are advised to go to kindergarten and watch how peers or teachers communicate with him. Perhaps the child is offended or humiliated. They shout, take away toys or even beat.
In such a situation, bites are just a way of self-defense. No, you cannot rush at little bullies with fists or screams. Mom or dad can not re-educate other people's children. But parents are able to teach their baby to defend themselves and defend their own opinions.
The child needs to be praised in order to increase his self-esteem. Then the mother says that the baby is not obliged to give toys to someone if he does not want to share. He must firmly say no and not. Adults show the child their love and willingness to listen, support and help with advice. But along the way they explain that biting or fighting is not worth it.
The reason for the child aggression were educators? Is the staff rude and using physical force for the kids? There are two options: look for another preschool or go to the manual.Talk with the manager, demand that rude teachers be fired or punished. If nothing has changed, it is better to entrust the upbringing of the baby to grandmother or transfer to a private kindergarten.
Boredom and lack of attention
Does a child bite his mother when she is sitting at a computer or is busy with her own affairs, and at the rest of the time she behaves diligently? Perhaps the baby does not have enough communication with parents, and he is trying to attract attention at least in this way.
Adults need to play more with a small family member, watch cartoons together or read books. More often hug him and show your love.
How to punish
If the child went outside and began to offend other children, his mother immediately takes him home. It is impossible to report to outsiders, so as not to humiliate the baby. He must understand that he did poorly, therefore he is punished. You can not deviate from the original decision, even if the culprit will arrange a tantrum in the middle of the street, fall to the ground or scream.
At home, Mom explains that good boys or girls who do wrong deserve punishment. The child will not receive candy or will sit in the apartment until he realizes that you can’t bite.
If the baby is aggressive towards family, no member of the family should encourage his behavior. You can’t be touched or assume that a bad habit will pass in a year. Mom punished a child who bit her leg? Then dad or grandmother has no right to give the upset kid candy, turn on cartoons or promise that in the evening they will go for a walk to the playground.
Adults should not bite a child or beat, forbid to offend other people. Sometimes children show aggression to annoy their parents or as a protest.
Additional recommendations
To get rid of a bad habit, the baby should:
- Introduce drying, apples, carrots, crackers and other solid foods into his diet.
- Allocate a separate room or part of the room for the child so that he has space for games.
- Make sure that the baby goes to bed on time and moves a lot, getting rid of excess energy.
Usually, it’s enough for mother to punish the little bully several times and have a preventive conversation so that he stops biting. With aggressive and difficult children who do not respond to the comments of their parents, a psychologist should work.
Video: a child bites mom- how to behave
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